How to detect narcissistic tendencies during dating

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I recently met with Dr. Elinor Greenberg, author of Borderline, Narcissistic, and Schizoid Adaptations: The Pursuit of Love, Admiration, and Safety and several articles about narcissism and other personality disorders. Dr. Greenberg has done extensive research and study about these behaviors and the impact on the people around them.  Our conversation was specific to narcissism as it relates to marriage.

DK: In very short, what is narcissism?

EG: In way too short, narcissism is a set of coping mechanisms and strategies to deal with unstable self-esteem and low capacity for empathy that results from unmet interpersonal needs in childhood.

DK: So what might that look like in a marriage?  What might it be like to be married to a narcissist?

EG: First, I want to clarify. Nobody is a narcissist. Labels, however well intended, cannot do justice to human complexity. Someone may have a pattern of behaviors that fall…

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